The Great Rift Valley

On Sunday, we were taken up to Naivashu and Nakura to see the Great Rift Valley. As always, the trip there (and the trip back) were death defying. The access to the Valley is through a mountain pass at approximately 7100 ft. The road up the outer rim is essentially one lane up and one lane down, but in true Kenyan form, it’s possible to fit three vehicles side by side (regardless of the direction of travel) on the pavement and one on each shoulder, for a grand total of 5 vehicles moving either up or down the mountain at any given time. 

Scary? Sure, but you also have to account for the fact that the downward moving traffic, with the help of gravity, is moving at roughly 3 times the speed of sound, while the uphill traffic, stalled by massive trucks screaming, “I think I can, I think I can!”, is crawling. But, not every vehicle going up is dragging 10 tons of rocks, NOOOO, some of the little SUVs and small sedans are trying to sprint up the hill. Where, pray tell, could they drive to get around the trucks? Why not into the oncoming traffic? Why not try it ona blind curve? Why not try it on a blind curve at a 40% grade? Hell, let’s have about 6 cars, pull out into oncoming traffic on blind curve! At a few points, there were more cars going up the hill in the WRONG lane than the correct one (I was going to say “right lane”, but the correct lane would actually be the left lane, and why further confuse an already confusing situation? I mean, lanes are completely optional to begin with, left lane, right lane, right lane, wrong lane...it’s all just semantics!). 

Alas, we arrive at the overlook shown above and the world opens up in front of us revealing an awe inspiring sight. I mean, since my recent trip to the Smithsonian in DC, I  am now very aware that I was overlooking the cradle of life for the human species. The power of the moment lasted about 7 seconds until one of the many merchants who had set up shop at the vista began peddling his wears in my face. I got him to identify a few of the key landscape features and then, as politely as possible, I sent him away. Fortunately for me, just as I was telling him I wasn’t buying anything, a van load of Asian tourists popped out of another van and he must have smelled fresh meat, because he didn’t even say goodbye, he vanished in a puff of smoke...I will call him the Ninja Vendor.

The rest of the trip to Naivashu was relatively uneventful. Seeing a death hung heavy around every corner, we did strike up a conversation with Paul, our KCEMT chaperone about the availability of ambulances and trauma services where we were. Suffice it to say, when he explained that there were TWO ambulances covering the entire region and, if called, we would be taken to Naivashu Hospital, which is a Level 5 Trauma Center. In my mind, I’m thinking that if St. Francis in Poughkeepsie is a Level 2 Trauma Center, what the hell is a Level 5 Trauma Center?!?!!? If Caren and me are both home, I think our kitchen might qualify as a Level 5 Trauma Center!! Jeezus, considering there were TWO first aid kits in the the van, and it was loaded with experienced Paramedics (and one EMT, which Johnny is VERY quick to remind everyone), we MUST qualify as a Level 5 Trauma Center...alright, maybe Level 6. Point being, when the van starts careening sideways, bend over and kiss your ass goodbye, ‘cause you’re screwed!